Why You Shouldn’t Misgender someone (And What to Do)

The flag representing the LBGT+ community as a whole.

The Advocate

The flag representing the LBGT+ community as a whole.

Berlens Louidort, Club Member


A while back when we were still iffy about everything coming to light, from being homosexual or even dressing differently, we are even still now to this day figuring ourselves out for the better of ourselves.

Many people are Enby, which means nonbinary; they don’t identify as either female or male. Or maybe someone is trans, but never went through physical change due to family or even not being ready yet to go through the change. How we identify ourselves, and of course, we wouldn’t want anyone to think you’re someone else or something else.

Basic misgendering is when someone goes by they/them and you decide to call them he/him or even she/her. When we misgender someone, it could make them feel as if they aren’t being heard or being heavily misunderstood. For some, it’s a thing in passing and they would just correct you but for others, it’s definitely something a part of them, regardless of whether they react to it or not.

A way to make sure not to misgender someone is simply asking for pronouns! Many platforms such as Instagram recently put a feature where you could keep your pronouns right in your bio so whoever decides to look at your page can see it. Then, once they do, they will figure out what you are or go by. Even some simple words like “Just to make sure, what are your pronouns?” work. Simple words like that would tell you about the person, so you could still have respect for the person regardless of their status.

Of course, if you do end up misgendering someone, it isn’t the end of the world. Simply apologize and use their pronouns next time! Most wouldn’t find it too uncommon to be misgendered, so don’t dwell in it explaining how bad you feel. It would end up feeling a bit odd, or even a bit much for the other person.

These are some things to keep in mind when it comes to pronouns.